Most high-achieving women are grieving something they’ve never named. Not the obvious losses — but the invisible ones:
- the identity they had to abandon to succeed
- the years spent being the strong one
- the dreams they outgrew but never mourned
- the self they left behind in the chaos
- the emotional weight they carried alone
This is grief. But because it doesn’t look like tragedy, we don’t treat it like grief. We call it “stress,” “exhaustion,” “a lot going on,” and then push through it like it’s nothing.
The PICU moment that shattered the illusion
Years ago, I sat next to my daughter’s hospital bed in the PICU while she fought for her life. And for the first time, I realized:
I am not Superwoman.
I cannot fix this.
And the grief of that truth nearly broke me.
It wasn’t just fear — it was mourning the version of myself who believed she had to hold everything together for everyone.
That moment exposed the truth: I had been living on top of years of unspoken, unprocessed grief.
Grief doesn’t disappear when you ignore it — it reroutes into your behavior
Unacknowledged grief shows up as:
- overfunctioning
- perfectionism
- emotional disconnection
- burnout
- resentment
- chronic self-sacrifice
- staying silent
- staying “strong”
- never slowing down
Not because you’re broken — but because your body had nowhere to put the pain.
If you’ve been feeling stuck, disconnected, or exhausted… ask yourself this:
What grief have I refused to name?
What truth have I been holding alone?
Naming the grief doesn’t weaken you. It liberates you.
